Reflection and pause - in travels
taking time out to pause and reflect - understanding that this is a natural state to be in whilst with a young child.. looking at what I most want to acheive now and how is the most effective way to accomplish all that.. travel and pc places.. motivation, inspiration... looking at quadrants.. which areas need working on to be more fulfilled? visit that here... best ways to fill the gaps and do those things. can loop back here to add deeper layers one year on. HOw has this changed me? do i now feel more fulfilled and on my way than i did one year ago>? still feel ot of balance sometimes, but this conscious act of looking at this has made me more aware to catch myself when i am falling and to recognise the importance of remaining in balance...
balance... what it all rests on.. quadrant theory, life... to remain in balance is a very good learning journey...
Rethink on nature of this project, what am i trying to sustain? and how? one year on, are my challenges still the same? do i need to look deeper now?
balance... what it all rests on.. quadrant theory, life... to remain in balance is a very good learning journey...
Rethink on nature of this project, what am i trying to sustain? and how? one year on, are my challenges still the same? do i need to look deeper now?
#2. Living within our limits
Firstly lets look at just what those limits are..
In the garden the limiting factors would be things like sunlight, water, and nutrients; all the things a living thing needs to flourish. So in a wider perspective of a human life, although of course we still need those basic survival elements, there are other limiting factors which play a part in our lives.
I see these as;
I identified some of the places for possible change being unnecessary driving and food shopping from unethical supermarkets. So, I decided to stop driving altogether and go back to a combination of public transport and travelling less. As I was making this choice a friendly neighbour gave me a really lovely bicycle out of the blue, proof that I am heading in the right direction! Getting about by bike is fulfilling me more than I even thought it would. Not only is it healthier for me and for the air around us, but I'm saving so much money by not having a van. May I never see another service station as long as I live. And I always felt concerned for wee man being strapped to a chair facing nothing but cars and motorways for hours on end, not the environment I ever wanted him to be in. It feels wonderful to feel proud of the way I get about now. And Ohli loves it too, especially speeding down the bumpy hills. I think more carefully about where I need to go, and try not to make any unnecessary journeys.
Reflections one year on?
2. Financial
When I began this project I was a self employed single mother of a very young child. And for the first time in my life I began to receive outside support for my living costs. Since a young age I have always worked to support myself, apart from some short travelling breaks, and so to be supported to be a full time mother to my son at this time is something I was and am so incredibly grateful for. This support allowed me to take responsibility for his happiness, growth and development, and as he became (slightly) less demanding allowed me to begin thinking to lift our future by beginning this permaculture study.
Although I was very aware that my financial world was very uncertain, being totally dependant on a system that I have no control over, in these early days I recognised that I would like to find a pathway to leave this support and become independent and financially secure, but felt that it was not yet time to be embarking on that journey. This financial support felt to be the best option for me at that time, to allow me to continue my studies and raise my son.
One year on...
Things have moved on from here for me now. One year on, I have more capabilities now to look at my financial sustainability fully and in depth. Ohli is older now and I have more freedom, and I have grown into my mothering life with more courage and confidence of my abilities than I had one year ago whilst everything was so new. It still feels frightening to give up my means of support but I feel more capable of doing this now. I mention it here because looking back now, without a plan for finances here the gaping hole in this project is very apparent!
My personal financial journey and route to sustainability is a big thing, so is a project in itself. This is project 6 (you can link to that here)
In the garden the limiting factors would be things like sunlight, water, and nutrients; all the things a living thing needs to flourish. So in a wider perspective of a human life, although of course we still need those basic survival elements, there are other limiting factors which play a part in our lives.
I see these as;
- Ecological/environmental
- Financial
- Personal/energetic
- Intellectual
- Spacial/physical (connects with energetic regarding housing)
- Ecological/environmental
I identified some of the places for possible change being unnecessary driving and food shopping from unethical supermarkets. So, I decided to stop driving altogether and go back to a combination of public transport and travelling less. As I was making this choice a friendly neighbour gave me a really lovely bicycle out of the blue, proof that I am heading in the right direction! Getting about by bike is fulfilling me more than I even thought it would. Not only is it healthier for me and for the air around us, but I'm saving so much money by not having a van. May I never see another service station as long as I live. And I always felt concerned for wee man being strapped to a chair facing nothing but cars and motorways for hours on end, not the environment I ever wanted him to be in. It feels wonderful to feel proud of the way I get about now. And Ohli loves it too, especially speeding down the bumpy hills. I think more carefully about where I need to go, and try not to make any unnecessary journeys.
Reflections one year on?
2. Financial
When I began this project I was a self employed single mother of a very young child. And for the first time in my life I began to receive outside support for my living costs. Since a young age I have always worked to support myself, apart from some short travelling breaks, and so to be supported to be a full time mother to my son at this time is something I was and am so incredibly grateful for. This support allowed me to take responsibility for his happiness, growth and development, and as he became (slightly) less demanding allowed me to begin thinking to lift our future by beginning this permaculture study.
Although I was very aware that my financial world was very uncertain, being totally dependant on a system that I have no control over, in these early days I recognised that I would like to find a pathway to leave this support and become independent and financially secure, but felt that it was not yet time to be embarking on that journey. This financial support felt to be the best option for me at that time, to allow me to continue my studies and raise my son.
One year on...
Things have moved on from here for me now. One year on, I have more capabilities now to look at my financial sustainability fully and in depth. Ohli is older now and I have more freedom, and I have grown into my mothering life with more courage and confidence of my abilities than I had one year ago whilst everything was so new. It still feels frightening to give up my means of support but I feel more capable of doing this now. I mention it here because looking back now, without a plan for finances here the gaping hole in this project is very apparent!
My personal financial journey and route to sustainability is a big thing, so is a project in itself. This is project 6 (you can link to that here)
Designs
based upon principles...
multiple functions - multi tasking... upload pics and add some interesting things, articles, etc??
taking time out to pause and reflect - understanding that this is a natural state to be in whilst with a young child.. looking at what I most want to acheive now and how is the most effective way to accomplish all that.. travel and pc places.. motivation, inspiration... looking at quadrants.. which areas need working on to be more fulfilled? visit that here... best ways to fill the gaps and do those things. can loop back here to add deeper layers one year on. HOw has this changed me? do i now feel more fulfilled and on my way than i did one year ago>? still feel ot of balance sometimes, but this conscious act of looking at this has made me more aware to catch myself when i am falling and to recognise the importance of remaining in balance...
balance... what it all rests on.. quadrant theory, life... to remain in balance is a very goosd lear
multiple functions - multi tasking... upload pics and add some interesting things, articles, etc??
taking time out to pause and reflect - understanding that this is a natural state to be in whilst with a young child.. looking at what I most want to acheive now and how is the most effective way to accomplish all that.. travel and pc places.. motivation, inspiration... looking at quadrants.. which areas need working on to be more fulfilled? visit that here... best ways to fill the gaps and do those things. can loop back here to add deeper layers one year on. HOw has this changed me? do i now feel more fulfilled and on my way than i did one year ago>? still feel ot of balance sometimes, but this conscious act of looking at this has made me more aware to catch myself when i am falling and to recognise the importance of remaining in balance...
balance... what it all rests on.. quadrant theory, life... to remain in balance is a very goosd lear
Design and implementation
This design is very much an internal processing life based design, and so has been a journey of many changes over a long period of time as what needs to be done becomes clear. It hasn't been as simple and straightforward as deciding on some design points and immediately carrying them out, as at the beginning I was aware of what I was unsatisfied with but not on then best way to make changes. So I have listed the design points and given a time based update on what and how I have changed, to try and best document this all.
Hope that makes sense...
Hope that makes sense...
Integrating permaculture principles
Encouraging diversity
I looked at the importance of having diversity within my friends, surroundings and activities, and noticed that I could benefit from having more variety in all these areas.
Balance
I feel that I give out my energy to a lot of people, and whilst I do receive energy back in return I do often feel drained and tired. This is undoubtedly because I have a small family dependent on me. I notice that having animals surrounding me helps me to feel sustained, their non-conditional love refills my energy levels!
Living within limits
I can see that I tend to take on too much, trying to do too many things and wearing myself out both emotionally and physically.
I looked at the importance of having diversity within my friends, surroundings and activities, and noticed that I could benefit from having more variety in all these areas.
Balance
I feel that I give out my energy to a lot of people, and whilst I do receive energy back in return I do often feel drained and tired. This is undoubtedly because I have a small family dependent on me. I notice that having animals surrounding me helps me to feel sustained, their non-conditional love refills my energy levels!
Living within limits
I can see that I tend to take on too much, trying to do too many things and wearing myself out both emotionally and physically.
I next brainstormed the things that I thought were important for us. From this I focused on four main things:
- Ohli's happiness: having positive influences, children to play with around him, my devoted time, nature and beautiful surroundings. (Of course this is my opinion, I'll have to wait until he's a bit older to find out what really would bring him happiness. Though I imagine that with this basic foundation, he'll have the best start I can give him)
- My happiness: socialisation, contentment, wilderness, community, good friends, activities I enjoy, spare time.
- Our home: Some of the possibilities I see at the moment are living in a van, in a new house, or in a yurt in the woods.
- Supporting ourselves: leaving behind the support of benefits, and my study options - my permaculture diploma, Open University to finish my degree in Ecology, Steiner teacher training, and/or crafting.
Analysis
From all this I can see some real changes that need to take place.
Please continue on to the designs here
- I am feeling a real lack of personal space and time, both in my home and also for finding time to do all the things that I would like to do. I am taking on too many things and not finding the time for any of them, and feeling frustrated. I need to organize my time in a more productive way.
- Although there are many advantages to my housing situation, (friendship, company, financial benefits) the disadvantages are all things that are important to me and my family and our happiness. (Lack of space/privacy, constant company and activity, huge house to maintain, lack of control of how my family live, activity choices, food, parenting styles etc..)
- I would like to simplify my life, find a way to prioritise my activities and multi-task wherever possible.
- I would like to find ways of adding things into my daily life that will keep me energetically sustained, especially if I'm feeling drained or tired. The things I know that help me feel empowered and strong are; travelling and independence, reading inspiring books, maintaining good, solid loving connections with people, time to myself doing things I enjoy, being inspired and creating, meditation and yoga.
- Some of my external actions are not gentle on the world around me. This seems to be partially dependent on money, on feeling overwhelmed, and of lacking in time and energy and needing to find the easiest option. As I'm trying to integrate permaculture practices and principles into my whole life I would like to look for some solutions here that feel to be heading more in the right direction.
Please continue on to the designs here
So far I've looked at ways that I can try to keep Ohli and myself emotionally sustained, but I haven't looked at all at our physical impact on the world around us and how we can make that more sustainable for nature as a greater whole.
At this time I was living in a shared house and eating communally, using a variety of wholefoods ordered in bulk supply between ourselves and friends, food grown in the garden, local produce from farmer neighbours (potatoes, mostly), veg box delivery schemes, superfood and health foods, and also supermarket shopping. A whole range! Sadly when the money's tight ethical and organic food shopping becomes impossible. It explains why so many people in this country eat such terrible food..
Since having a child I have gradually moved from being a bicycle lover and public transporter to being a fully fledged van driver. I have made quite a lot of long journeys in the van over the past year or so, driving all over the country. I also rarely get the bus or train and always favour driving, with the reasoning that it's just so much easier with a small child and a dog in tow. Especially living out in the countryside, especially in the Scottish weather.
I gave up flying years ago, only to start again since having Ohli. His father is Italian so we occasionally go to visit the grandparents, and after going overland the once when he was very young I gave into the disgraceful ease and inexpense of flights the following times.
When giving it some thought I also realised that driving fills other functions for me, not only getting about. Having a van has given me a feeling of freedom, and of staying connected with friends who I may have lost contact with otherwise, as I often have so little opportunity for chatting on the phone or getting out to gatherings.
At this time I was living in a shared house and eating communally, using a variety of wholefoods ordered in bulk supply between ourselves and friends, food grown in the garden, local produce from farmer neighbours (potatoes, mostly), veg box delivery schemes, superfood and health foods, and also supermarket shopping. A whole range! Sadly when the money's tight ethical and organic food shopping becomes impossible. It explains why so many people in this country eat such terrible food..
Since having a child I have gradually moved from being a bicycle lover and public transporter to being a fully fledged van driver. I have made quite a lot of long journeys in the van over the past year or so, driving all over the country. I also rarely get the bus or train and always favour driving, with the reasoning that it's just so much easier with a small child and a dog in tow. Especially living out in the countryside, especially in the Scottish weather.
I gave up flying years ago, only to start again since having Ohli. His father is Italian so we occasionally go to visit the grandparents, and after going overland the once when he was very young I gave into the disgraceful ease and inexpense of flights the following times.
When giving it some thought I also realised that driving fills other functions for me, not only getting about. Having a van has given me a feeling of freedom, and of staying connected with friends who I may have lost contact with otherwise, as I often have so little opportunity for chatting on the phone or getting out to gatherings.
Integrating permaculture principles
Encouraging diversity
I looked at the importance of having diversity within my friends, surroundings and activities, and noticed that I could benefit from having more variety in all these areas.
Balance
I feel that I give out my energy to a lot of people, and whilst I do receive energy back in return I do often feel drained and tired. This is undoubtedly because I have a small family dependent on me. I notice that having animals surrounding me helps me to feel sustained, their non-conditional love refills my energy levels!
Living within limits
I can see that I tend to take on too much, trying to do too many things and wearing myself out both emotionally and physically.
I looked at the importance of having diversity within my friends, surroundings and activities, and noticed that I could benefit from having more variety in all these areas.
Balance
I feel that I give out my energy to a lot of people, and whilst I do receive energy back in return I do often feel drained and tired. This is undoubtedly because I have a small family dependent on me. I notice that having animals surrounding me helps me to feel sustained, their non-conditional love refills my energy levels!
Living within limits
I can see that I tend to take on too much, trying to do too many things and wearing myself out both emotionally and physically.